Lately I've been thinking a lot about what kinds of qualities I want the next guy to have. At first I didn't think I was that picky until I started listing them. I'm going to do so now and hopefully I don't create an unrealistic ideal.
1. His name can not be Jon. My brother's name is Jon. My ex's name is Jon. It would just be WAY too confusing if I was trying to talk about him to anyone else. I already get, wait, which Jon are you talking about? That would just make it worse.
2. I want the nice guy. I hear guys complain that you have to be an asshole to get the girl. I hear girls complain that soandso is just too nice. That's what I want!! We should all want to be treated well.
3. I've heard the phrase a few times, "I feel like I can never be good enough for you." My expectations weren't unrealistic but it still made me feel bad. Well DANG IT! I am not lowering my standards! If a guy feels that way, then maybe he isn't good enough for me!
4. As an extension of the last point. I want them to try as hard and do as much as I do and try for them. I don't want a one sided relationship. I don't want to feel like I have to bail water twice as much just to stay afloat.
5. I want an easy-going/non-judgemental guy. I think I'm easy going if I'm treated right. I'd like the same consideration. I need alone time now. I need to be able to go off and think when I'm angry. If I'm calm then I can organize my thoughts and reason through arguments better. I need someone that would allow me to do that. My extended family make-up requires a non-judgemental individual. I dislike close-minded people that won't even stop and consider a point of view that differs from their own.
6. I prefer dark hair in an individual. That's what I'm usually attracted to. There are a few exceptions to that but for some reason that is what I gravitate towards.
7. Honesty is a BIG deal. It almost makes me physically ill to lie. If I think I've skirted anywhere close to that, I have to come clean right away. I hate lies and I really can no longer tolerate it. I've done that enough in my life.
8. I want to be able to converse with him. I want the kind of communication where you can tell him anything, even embarrassing stuff, and it's ok. I want our interaction to be lively even if there is no ready conversation topics at hand.
9. I want his typing to be easy to read. Misspellings and lazy typing; you = u and your = ur and before = b4. That drives me nuts.
10. Humor is great. It keeps us young. I love most types of humor. The next guy needs to be smart enough to understand my humor without needing every word and phrase explained.